{1 year ago today}

I cannot believe it has been one whole year since our little girl was born. It feels like yesterday and a lifetime ago all at the same time. I remember every detail for about 3 days before leading up to that night in the hospital. It's still so vivid and real! I remember Travis being so strong for me. And I remember the exact moment after the nurses left and we were alone; he sat in a chair next to me while I was in the hospital bed, and just looked in my eyes and said "it's going to be okay." And it was okay and it is okay.

It's hard not having Elaine Raquel crawling around the house right now, not knowing what she would have acted like or looked like. There will always be that void of what could have been. But the miracle of this life is getting to experience both the bitter and the sweet as now, here I am one year later, up in the middle of the night with a hungry little boy who needs me to take care of him now, and how grateful I am for the opportunity to do that.

We celebrated her life today with some cupcakes, looking at pictures, and looking through her memory box the hospital gave us. We also had some pink gerbera daisies placed on her grave!

We are grateful for our little family!